h.w # 25

PART 1

Hey Sarah,
I liked your story it was interesting to read and the character of your story was real and her self not trying to be someone ells which is cool to me, I liked how you said “ the girl was saying ”I could feel my face getting bright red” and in the story the girl seemed like she’s talking more and more about her and being comfortable which she wasn’t in the beginning.

Hey Abe,
I like your story and how its talking about report cards, your story is talking about real stuff happening now a day’s , the one who didn’t pass 2 f his class’s was feeling “cool” because he think his self like he’s too cool for school (for me he’s un cool) because he’s going to end up in shit, no job and no life, and I think the one who passed and are feeling good are cool, and the one who failed feels he’s so cool because he have a car and like it’s a big deal. It’s a good story, I enjoyed reading it, keep it up.

Hey Jace,
I liked your story, but it was a little bit short, but I liked how you use imagery (the balloon and are life) here is nothing ells to say for me, keep using imagery but not for the whole story, like talk about other stuff and with details, good job.

Hey amber,
I liked your story, it was good (not short and not long) but the character didn’t sound cool to me because she was acting like she’s a big shit, like “expelled me now” she can just explane what happens with her or bring a note from family and they will go over it lol but not this way, not saying the story is bad, the story is great, good job keep it up.

Hey Amon,
Your story doesn’t relate to the school at all and I think it should be but I’m not sure ask and see, but I liked the story you have and I think the character shouldn’t care about the other people and what they think and be his self and that would be cool.



PART 2

I think everyone is talking about them self’s and how they go in school, and what they usually do, like amon smokes so he puts in his story smoking stuff, but the think that related between almost everyone that’s they say that everyone be having I-pods on when they go in school(they say that either by saying, oh she saw the teacher lips moving, or I was listening to music when I was walking in…etc) and text messaging in class was in a lot of story’s, like in the story’s we were talking about are self and what we do and all what related between all the story’s is(i-pods and text messaging).